Top 10 List: Ten things I learned in first year med school

Guest-written by my classmate Jay...used with permission, of course. I don't just steal things off my friends' Facebook profiles without asking!

1) I now get annoyed when conversations, even daily conversations I have with family and friends, aren’t quick and to the point, and last longer than 8-10 minutes.

2) The only treatment for a muscle injury is nothing.

3) A patient will not fully disclose the information you inquire about until after you’ve asked, re-phrased, asked again, re-phrased again, and then asked while cocking your head slightly to the side in a conscious gesture of interest... I call it the power-cock.

4) Prednisolone is Snoop Dogg’s prednisone.

5) On a scale of 1 to 10, 5 is not firm enough to penetrate.

6) Even for $14,000 per student, a well-thought-out curriculum and well-taught lectures aren’t guaranteed.

7) Foosball is a cunning game of skill, agility, dexterity, and mental steeliness.

8) Short white coats do two things: they instantly identify you as a clueless rookie… and, they make kids cry.

9) The one time you fake it and say you can hear a bruit or murmur, the clinical instructor will say that there isn’t one.

10) Med school is nothing more than just really hard school.

Update: Jay wrote another list at the end of second year.